Tag Archives: life

Often when we are in pain, lost or blocked in our lives we try to ‘deal with it’ as best we can. We push and push until we can no longer cope with our circumstances and the chain has to break, this can take the form of an ending in career, relationship or a health scare. Our body has found a way to get our attention. What we are unaware of is that through our childhood we have ‘adopted’ patterns from our parents, carers and teachers.  Patterns which don’t resonate with what we believe now but which served to help us to fit in as a child so as we would not be abandoned, whether it be physically but most often emotionally.  We learnt to shut down our feelings to fit in.  To do this we had to shut down parts of ourselves that weren’t ‘accepted’ by our loved ones…

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  It was a day like any other. The clouds were floating by like candy floss being spun onto a wooden stick. The wind was building up outside. People passing by the window zipped up their coats so as not to feel the chill of the wind moving through their bodies. The wind felt as bitter as the icy snow starting to fall from the skies. It was winter and yet it wasn’t unusual to experience these weather conditions in the spring too. After all, I live in the UK, we see it all here. I was pleased that I was inside today, all cosy and warm. I had my favourite Angora cardigan on, the softness and texture enveloped me in a comfortable glow of happiness. From the outside, all was well. On the inside, I was falling apart. And I didn’t know what to do. It all started with the way that I had ‘abandoned’ myself over the years. I wasn’t…

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What is it like to feel unsettled? It could be that your mind is racing forwards like a Mustang V8 engine raring to let rip! It could be you have invested heavily into the stocks and shares of your relationship or job and no matter how much you more you invest, it is not fulfilling you. Or it could be rollercoaster ride of experiences and the never-ending ups followed by downs is exhausting you. Even the exhaustion of completing a mountain of tasks or being there for everyone else and never having a moment for you. What are your experiences? This is what suicide felt like…to me It was a week since I received a phone call telling me that my fiancé was…dead. I couldn’t believe it, my heart sank, I felt empty and a huge part of my soul was ripped from me in that split second.  Imagine the…

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